Monday, April 16, 2012
Turn Me On
Yesterday I answered WHY and HOW...sort of...to why I write romance.
Today...We are gonna get dirty.
Yes, we are gonna talk about sex. Kiddies, now is a good time for you to go to your room and play video games while I talk to yer parents.
Okay, kids all gone? Everyone over 18 in here?
Sex. It used to be dirty to say it. With 50 Shades of Suck, people are obviously much more okay with talking about it. I have noticed this even in my small town...used to be that if I talked openly and honestly about s.e.x...well...people would laugh uncomfortably and turn red or change the topic.
Considering the people I was generally talking to were adults, most with kids or in relationships...blushing like teenage virgins when I suggested that they had bumped carpet pets at some point or another...uh, this was hilarious to me. I mean, here I am...one of the few people choosing not to have sex and I am more okay with talking about it than you...who regularly do the tangled sheet mambo?
This made me wonder how much they were communicating with each other. I really hoped they were talking to each other more than they were talkin to me.
But now...people talk about it. People have thrown open the bedroom door and discuss things that they wouldn't ten years ago. Which is great...and a lot of you are shaking your heads right now but let me tell you WHY I think it is great.
If we can't talk about sex, we can't talk about disease, health, warning signs...things that should be talked about. I have showed my kids the condom in my wallet (which made everyone have a good laugh at my expense because the damn thing had been expired for a year...shows how much I USE my wallet condoms...*sigh*) because, as I told my very embarrassed teenage daughter, if you are not comfortable enough with a man to say the word 'condom' or discuss birth control and stds...he really should not be putting his hands on ANYTHING that is normally covered by clothes.
Not a bad rule, really. If you can't discuss condoms, should his tongue be down your throat? If the mention of a condom makes you turn fifty shades of red (y'see what I did there? lol) then perhaps you are not mature enough to bump fuzzies.
I mean...communication is really important stuff. If you don't have that...do you want to frolic in the garden of naked applause? Uh, no. You shouldn't. Something is very wrong.
I wrote a story that was kind of centered on that ability to communicate...actually, most of my characters show it at some point or another. I admit, this is intentional.
Because...secret? Do you want to know what really...really...really turns me on?
Someone who listens. Someone who doesn't just hear the words coming out of your mouth but understands you.
Is there anything sexier than that?
Okay, abs are nice but I still think the listening thing is sexy as hell.
What turns you on? (Okay, why do I think SOMEONE is going to write whipped cream?)